Amazinzay.com

I’m stuck. I don’t know how else to put it. I am stuck in this place of faking it on the outside but hurting on the inside. “I am fine” I tell myself over and over but it doesn’t help. If anyone asks “Are you ok?” my answer is yes but the truth is no, I am not ok, I am hurting worse than I have ever hurt before but I don’t know how to fix it. I feel like crying but I cannot, I physically can no longer cry even when I feel like I need to. I seem to only be able to cry when I am around people but then I don’t want to cry. “I need to be strong” I tell myself, but how can I be strong when the pain overwhelms me so that I feel like nothing matters?

-zay

Is my real weakness my need to be strong?